February 3, 2009
Why aren't you here? The pain overshadows everything in my life. Nothing is truly happiness without you. Five months has past. How can this be? I can imagine your laugh -your smile- the crinkle in your nose. I miss your sweet face. How would it have changed? It will never change. I don't want to imagine you- I want you. No one understands. No one wants to understand my pain. I want someone to care. Some want me to be me. Others look at me like I'm broken. The rest don't know of you, I'm just another person. You were here- now you're gone. Why do I have to live in a world that isn't changed after losing you? With people that want me to pretend like I'm happy. With people that want to treat me like I'm not hurt. I hate this world that remains the same without you. I'm swirling in my pain- they all pass me by. I can't ever let you go; I'm sorry beautiful angel. I love you. I miss you. I want you. I will forever yearn for the impossible. This is my life. It will never be full.
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