I watched Faith's 4D

edit I watched Faith's 4D
Friday, May 15, 2009 I watched Faith's 4D ultrasound yesterday. It's the only thing I have of her that shows her perfection-alive and beautiful. Watching her little hands and feet moving around was so sweet and brought back the excitement of that day-Seeing who she looked like and feeling the happiness knowing soon we would meet her. She was so innocent and doing what a baby is suppose to do not knowing what was to come in just 8 weeks. I just wanted to reach in and hold her sweet hand and kiss her perfect nose.I wanted to take her out. Why Why Why and how does something they need end up taking them from us?

While watching it i had to try to see the knot in her cord. It stole my chance to love her alive. I'm not a dr or trained ultrasound tech, but i know that I saw it. It was as if Faith was trying to show it, pleading for us to notice. Sweet baby if i only knew what I know now.How can perfection be stolen and replaced with this hell of grief? I want you back Faith! Your death was senseless. I miss you. I love you. I can't have you.